Changes, and the challenges change brings, can mean doing something "new" for holiday dinners. I remember the first Christmas my son and I shared after the divorce. He was a senior in high school and wanted to try something "different." Instead of the "tradition" of our family dinner, before going to the big family dinner, he and I went and worked (helped?) at the community dinner. We helped with several things including serving, then eating and cleaning up. It was a "new" tradition we followed for quite a number of years.
I continued the tradition even after he was married, living in a different state with no way for our family to be together. I often did Thanksgiving Community Dinners because getting "home" for one day, or meal, wasn't happening because of distance, schedule, ministerial needs. It was a way to be with others, celebrate the holiday and give thanks for blessings. So...... What are you doing for Thanksgiving? Can you help with a "community" dinner? Can you invite others to your table? Instead of the crying, this time, maybe sharing works....... Who knows - maybe it will even bring laughter!
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How do you remember eating Thanksgiving dinner? Do you remember the "kids" table with the adults in a different room? Do you remember everyone at one table? The Thanksgiving I mentioned yesterday, when we were in college, we set the food on our table (and some on the counter) serving it buffet style. Everyone sat wherever they could - we were younger then! - including some on the floor.
Or the Thanksgiving our son was a newborn. The whole family had gathered at the new "great-grandparents" for Thanksgiving. The table was setup in the living room with an "extra" table added to make enough room for everyone to sit down. Great-grandpa was at one end (away from the kitchen door where great-grandma was) and the newest (great-grandson) was in what is now called "his bucket" on the TV at the other end. I don't even remember how many people sat down for that dinner but we all enjoyed the food and fellowship. So....... are you inviting others to dinner? Have you figured out the tables? Buffet style? "Sit down" to eat? Tables in different rooms? All at one table? Somehow no matter which way it is done it all works! The importance is to remember to thank God for the food and fellowship. Think back, for just a moment, about past Thanksgiving dinners. How far back can you remember? Who was at the dinner? Was it "only" family? Was it a wide variety of people some of whom you don't remember let alone see anymore?
One of the earliest I remember is the first one my then husband and I couldn't get "home" for. He had been given a turkey where he was working. We invited our Bible study group to our apartment (we were in college) with everyone bringing something. It was pretty much an "all afternoon" meal but it was fun and we were with friends - all of whom were not able to "go home" for Thanksgiving either. The part I still laugh about was having to call my Mom and ask "which end of the turkey do I stuff?" (Remember I didn't know much then [or now!] about cooking!) When she stopped laughing she said "both ends, dear, both ends." This started the tradition of not being "alone" for Thanksgiving (or other holidays) for me. I always check to see if someone will be by themselves. I always ask if they would like to be with others. I understand completely when someone wants to be alone. I also enjoy including those who want company. What are your Thanksgiving dinner memories? Are you at least smiling (both ends!) if not laughing? Can you think of somone to check to see if they would like to share your Thanksgiving dinner? Hurry up...then answer questions...then wait. Depending on what the appointment is for you may have more questions to answer and more waiting. Sometimes you get moved from one person asking questions to the next person to another person. Sometimes you also get moved from one room to the next.
One of the times Dad was scheduled for "one day" surgery we had to arrive for "check in" at about 6 am. This meant we left the house at 5 and drove for an hour. As we got to the first check in Dad was asked for name, birthday and some other questions. He answered with his name, his date of birth and 6:05 am. We get to the next person who is again asking for name, birthday and other questions. Dad again answered with his name, birthday and 6:15 am. I admit it took me to the third time before I caught what he was doing. Every time they asked for his name and birthday he answered with the name, date and the time on the clock over the person's head. By the time he was headed for the procedure he had been born at 6:05, 6:15, 6:45 and 8:05. Like I have said before....sometimes you have to laugh or you will start screaming. It also gives wonderful memories when checking in for appointments! Special holidays, with special music, can bring even more special memories. Some of the memories bring quiet tears. Some bring great laughter. Some are a combination of both. I love history so remembering special historic events means a lot to me. Like the 11th hour on the 11th day of the 11th month -- a day of VERY important events that should be remembered and honored.
The music memories come from the various specials programs happening on, and around, these special days. I love the medley of all the "military" hymns. I especially love when the leader asks those who have served to stand as "their hymn is played." It is awesome to watch as all those who are able stand do. Usually even the ones who are not able to stand salute - or at least sit up straighter. Both my uncles, and Dad, served during WW II. Dad, and his brother, were in the Army Air Corp which became the Air Force. Mother's brother served in the Pacific in the Navy. I was blessed to be able to be with Dad at some of the special programs. Towards the end he needed help to stand, and he leaned on his walker, but he still stood. Sometimes it's "just" a smile for a happy memory....... Today is an interesting day. A day to remember all of the loved ones who have "gone before us" to be with God. I have seen several special posts to remind us. I know that several churches are having special services. I also know that quite a few churches will be celebrating "All Saints" on Sunday. A wonderful way of celebrating the "Communion of the Saints" by recognizing we will be seeing our loved ones again.
One of the posts I saw was about remembering our loved ones. I was Dad's primary care giver. Mentally Dad was "with it" right up until lunch the day he died (eleven years ago yesterday). He was still giving the nurses a hard time, AND doing ministry, right up until lunch. I can look back, now, and be very thankful I could fulfill his last request to NOT be alone - I was able to sit beside him. There are a lot of things I remember, and laugh about, now. Like offering to share him with others - I even offered "The Ransom of Red Chief" in that I would "pay" someone to keep him. I remember he used to make comments, to get to me, whenever he wanted to - yes, even in the middle of my sermon. I remember being able to "get him back." I remember the love even as I remind people you have to laugh or you will start screaming. Something to think about......... |
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